(©Dan Mack 1998)

"Bilbo, fetch me my cane!"

Short but long, thin but round
Stealthy, slipping inching down and hairy
Happy gulping sound
And suddenly lighter by one pound

Bilbo, bulbous Bilbo
Hairy hobbit hero
Bilbo, bulbous dildo
Solo throbbit hero

Under misty mountains cold
In dungeons deep and caverns old
In tunnels dark and dry
And when it puts its ring around it
It's unseen but by one eye

Bilbo, bulbous Bilbo
Hairy hairy hobbit hero
Bilbo, bulbous Bilbo
Solo throbbit hero
Bilbo, bulbous Bilbo
Hairy hairy hobbit hero
Bilbo, bulbous dildo
Solo throbbit hero

[Gollum] "It guesses!"

[Bilbo] "Leave me alone..."

[Gollum] "Its goes again! So tired...Is it juicy? Is it tasty?"
WE EATS IT!
WE EATS IT!
WE EATS IT!
WE EATS IT!"

[Bilbo] "What have I got in my pocket?"

[Gollum]
What has it got in its pocketssess?
Fat, nasty hobbit cockessessess!
What has it got in its pocketssess?
Fat, nasty hobbit cockessessess!
What has it got in its pocketssess?
Fat, nasty hobbit cockessessess!
What has it got in its pocketssess?
Fat, nasty hobbit cockessessess!

What has it got in its pocketssess?
Fat, nasty hobbit cockessessess!
What has it got in its pocketssess?
Fat, nasty hobbit cockessessess!

[Bilbo] "Here it comes again!"

[Gollum] "It hurts us!"

"Gollum"

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Other Recordings
Moldy Boof… (CD ?) [cover by DOGPILE]